Ella Langley – Choosin’ Texas

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Ella Langley has somehow turned “Choosin’ Texas” into an absolute monster of a country hit.

And we have questions.

Why is this bloke apparently more in love with an entire US state than his girlfriend? Why does two-stepping instantly reveal where someone wants to live? Why did Miranda Lambert once get pulled over with a kangaroo in the passenger seat? And most importantly, why does one particular lyric sound a LOT like Ella is planning to spend the night drinking and doing something else entirely by herself?

We also investigate the theory that “Choosin’ Texas” is secretly about Riley Green and Megan Moroney, blind rank some of the biggest albums of 2025 and sent Chibbs into battle against Ella Langley.

Then we try to work out how a song this forgettable became one of the biggest songs on the planet.

It’s 1001 Songs That Make You Want To Die.

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